Kristin Maschka, Author

When Kristin Maschka asked her husband to make their daughter a waffle one busy morning, the results were tears and recriminations. He had put the toaster waffle...into the toaster! Kristin scolded her husband, "Of course she won't eat that. It's crunchy!"

How could he not know his little girl liked her waffles soft from the microwave? How, Kristin wondered, had she become the waffle expert? She and her husband had agreed to co-parent but somehow the reality was simply not how she thought it would be.

Every mother has a crunchy waffle story - a moment of epiphany when the disconnect between "ideal family life" and real life becomes all too clear. In This Is Not How I Thought It Would Be, Kristin Maschka goes below the surface of mothers' everyday challenges to reveal the invisible, outdated assumptions about mothers, fathers, money, marriage and work that are completely out of sync with today's families.

Maschka weaves together her own story, anecdotes from mothers all over the country, and a deep knowledge of history and society to offer mothers a comforting, often funny read that helps them see themselves and the world around them in a whole new way. This book inspires mothers with the simple, concrete tools they need to remodel motherhood for themselves, their families, and their future.

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Kristin Maschka is a beacon of light in a sea of darkness about the possibilities for women looking to do "mothering and more" with their lives. She is smart, well educated about the details, and passionate in her quest to bring more knowledge to more women about more options. All women and men looking to juggle the multiple roles of parent, worker, spouse and more should read this book, soon and often - it will change, and improve, their lives!

Countless women are blindsided by the societal side effects of motherhood. This book brings mothers' lives and realities into sharp focus and provides readers with a vision - and tips and tools -for building a brighter future for themselves and all mothers. Remodeling Motherhood is the roadmap every mother needs!

Kristin Maschka really gets it - motherhood is not all fuzzy blankets, first smiles, and pastel-colored nurseries. She's honest enough to admit that the joyful arrival of children can be accompanied by tremendous self-doubt, anxiety, and inner conflict. Mothers inherit a legacy of out-dated assumptions, unfair expectations, and a fair amount of guilt no matter what they do. In relating her own experience with equal parts insight and hilarity, Kristin paints a nuanced portrait of what it really means to be a 21st century woman with children.

As President of Mothers & More, Kristin Maschka has worked tirelessly to support and advocate for mothers. Now she's written a book that distills what she's learned about the unspoken rules that define mothers' lives - and why bending or breaking those rules will lead to happier lives for women and their families.

Martha M. Bullen, coauthor, Staying Home: From Full-time Professional to Full-time Parent

This book takes you deep inside a couple’s remaking of their marriage to create happy lives for both parents. A standing ovation to Kristin Maschka for sharing this inspiring personal journey to genuine equally shared parenting!
Amy and Marc Vachon, authors of Equally Shared Parenting (forthcoming January 2010)

Reading "This Is Not How I Thought It Would Be" is like sitting alongside your best mom friend for a down 'n dirty chat about the realities of motherhood. You'll appreciate Maschka's engaging style as she candidly explores the real-life challenges and questions we all face as mothers. A must-read for all moms.

Michele Dortch, The Integrated Mother

My best advice to moms now is: Invest your precious moments to read this book. Kristin Maschka offers concrete, do-able steps to creating the life with children you want while gently challenging the habitual ways of thinking that limit our possibilities.
This is Not How I Thought It Would Be is both practical and inspiring!
Kim Tso, mother of two, nonprofit consultant

Did you wake up one day, after you had kids, and find that somehow your marriage had slipped into the 1950s? If you feel things heading in this direction, you need this book. With an impressive grasp of the research and a humane appreciation of the complexities of marriage, this book tells you how to start from wherever you are today, and work step by step towards creating the life, and the marriage, you really want.
Joan Williams, Professor, Director of the WorkLife Law Center at Hastings Law School,
and author of Unbending Gender

It is undoubtedly the case that otherwise intelligent, educated women are profoundly misinformed about the loss of power becoming a mother entails. It takes them by surprise and, because they're isolated, they don't know the solutions that other women have had to craft, also alone. Breaking down that isolation with books like this is urgent and important. Women spend far too much energy pretending to be happier than they really are. What they need to do is find solutions to the unhappiness a fake idea of family perpetuates -- and Kristin Maschka's book is one step towards finding those solutions. Kristin also makes a very important point, namely that the arrival of a child must change everyone - not just the Mom. Otherwise family has no meaning. So this book, while being important to women, is just as important for families who must reconfigure themselves with every new arrival. Kristin tells the truth and isn't trying to sell an instant cure. These are tough, knotty issues and we won't solve them without the kind of honesty that she brings to the subject.

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